Seven days on this glorified prison barge overrun by people with tattoos, drunken packs of teenagers with cornrowed hair, and drunks scurrying back to their cabins with yellow coolers full of "brewskies".
The lame, the halt, the impaired and the ever-present, ever-screaming children in strollers who's parents think that it's OK to bring them into restaurants and just let the young ones cry and the older one's run loose in the dining rooms. The food? If this ship were a diner, they'd be out of business... faux-fancy and every dish colder than the one before. Take out your wallet and go for the upgrade restaurants where the food is 20% better, but still cold and the screaming children will still be sitting right next to you.
The entertainment? Strictly catering hall wedding quality introduced by the world's most insincere cruise director.
The help? Three native English speakers out of a staff of over a thousand with what seemed like 90% being trained by the other 10%
With this kind of service and that kind of food I would have preferred a tray and a cafeteria line.
Breakfast: horrendous with cold scrambled eggs, dried bulk cooked, cold bacon, coffee? great one day and awful the next (same coffee I thought). You can get a custom omelet but it took 10 minutes on line. Want to go to a sit down dining room? Over an hour for the same dried out, cold food.
Cold, late, microscopic portions despite request to triple the vegetables. Tiny cups of coffee that take less time to cream and to sugar than it takes to consume them. "I want a carafe all to myself"...7 minutes to get it and it was small and half full....every day.
They want you to stay two hours for dinner. I want to stay 28 minutes at the outside. Freestyle dining means that you can't even BRIBE your way into something better because you never get the same waiter from one day to the next and they won't accept cash.
I had 4 shore excursions planned. They canceled them ALL and I went from the highest activity level excursion to AARP just for something to do.
450 Million for this behemoth and they have a sagging screen, insufficient candlepower, projection screen TV instead of a plasma screen affair with kids coming and going in packs and talking out loud non stop, in an unsupervised theater that seats 200. Pathetic.
Port Canaveral is an isolated dump that's only good if you are going to bus in to Disney, Universal or the Space Center. It's 5 miles into the K Mart, nothing town, and all this after steaming for 30 hours nonstop.
Miami? Why bother? A bus to a shopping arcade with a never-get-off bus tour. Look out the window at others who are free to walk around and DO something. Hurry back to the ship ....You only have until 5:30 PM to be back aboard and your bus left after 10:00 AM
Nassau, Bahamas: again, only 5 or six hours to walk around the 4 by 12 block town that has been culturally erased by the presence of multiple cruiseships in port raising the population from 400 to 4000 in 90 minutes. Hurry back to the ship...must be aboard by 6. The ship is leaving for....
New York? What do you mean we cannot get off at the "private Island" because it is too windy? TAKE ME BACK TO NASSAU and let me explore the island for a full day!...No way...two solid days steaming right back to New York, non-stop. I was robbed. Do you want this experience? Go anywhere else or stay home.